Tuesday 3rd September 2019
I sought my husband’s love and attention for so many years. I saw him as my savior, my best friend, my provider, my confidant and my everything. I expected him to be there for me always, I wanted him to place me above every woman in his life including his mother and sisters. I wanted him to call me his love, his queen and his everything. I elevated him both physically and emotionally and expected him to do same for me. I feared life without him. Once he is around me, I felt comfortable, secured, safe and calm. I depended so much on him emotionally and expected him to make me happy always. I expected him to be there for the family and to make the children happy always. I expected him to be the priest of our home, the prayer warrior and the guard. I expected him to lead, to protect, to guide and to preserve the family through life. I expected him to be financially secured always and to defend the family in time of trouble; I wanted him to fight all my battles his and that of the family. I made no room for excuses and failures. I wanted him to be my superman, the man of my dreams. The man every woman will be privileged to have and chit chat about. I wanted him to be my ‘Prince Charming’ who will stick with me alone and not speak with any woman. The list cannot be exhausted; I expected his life to revolve around me. Oh mine! I had made him my idol; I worshipped him and made no room for excuses, disappointments, nor failures. He must get it right all the time. No wonder I became so miserable exhausted, grumpy and unhappy. The arm of flesh will always fail us! I forgot that he is only human. In my misery and disappointment asking God to change him and make him the man of my dreams, I found true friendship in the Holy Spirit. He gave me peace, knowledge and opened my eyes to know that the love and everything I was hoping to get from my husband can rather be found in Jesus Christ. I had placed my husband in the place meant for only God in my heart. A place where no human can fill. Oh! how I have made my husband miserable with all my unrealistic demands and expectations. He also had an emptiness in his life that can only be filled by God. He needed my love as much as I needed his. He needed God’s help. The word of God is so true; unless God is elevated to occupy the rightful place in our hearts, our life and our relationships will be miserable. To elevate anything or anyone to the same level as God in our hearts is to bring division in our relationship with God and diminish our experience of His power and presence. Who do you spend most of your time thinking about? Who is your best friend? Your true love and your source of happiness? If your answer to any of these questions is anyone or anything other than God, you are worshipping an idol!